Bicycling is fun(ny)

Just for fun:
If there isn’t a source then it’s a joke from a friend or original wit.

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Isabell
Isabell who?
Isabell required on your bike?

You know you’re addicted to cycling when you have more bikes than the days of the week.

Q. Do you know what is the hardest part of learning to ride a bike?
A. The pavement. (source)

Q. Why did the lion chase the cyclist?
A. He heard that bikes are good for you. (source)


“I’ve really had it with my dog: he’ll chase anyone on a bicycle.”
“So what are you going to do – leave him at the dog’s home? Give him away? Sell him?”
“No, nothing that drastic. I think I’ll just confiscate his bike.”(source)

Q: Why did the boy take his bike to bed with him?
A: He didn’t want to walk in his sleep.

You know you’re addicted to cycling when the surgeon tells you need a heart valve replaced and you ask if you have the choice between presta and Schrader.

Q: Why don’t bikes stand up by themselves?
A: They’re two-tired!

You know you’re addicted to cycling when you catch your self using turn signals while navigating the grocery store isles.

Anyone else have a good bicycle related joke?


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3 Comments

  1. Posted August 10, 2010 at 6:40 pm | Permalink

    A cyclist on tour rode into town and stopped at a tavern for a cold drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found that his bike had been stolen.

    He goes back into the bar, he flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling.

    “WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY BIKE?” he shouted, with surprising forcefulness.

    No one answered.

    “ALL RIGHT! I'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA COLD DRINK, AND IF MY BIKE AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINISH, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!”

    Some of the locals shifted restlessly.

    He had another cold drink, walked outside, and what do you know? His bike was right where he left it! He swung his leg over the back and started to ride out of town.

    The bartender wanders out of the bar and asks, “Say partner, before you go… what did happen in Texas?”

    The cyclist turned back and said, “I had to walk home.”

  2. Posted August 10, 2010 at 6:30 pm | Permalink

    Cyclist dies and goes to heaven. St Peter greets him at the gate and the cyclist asks if there are bikes in heaven. Of course, St peter replies, and we can have one custom-made for you. Just then, another biker flies by them on a custom gold bike, a total blur. Wow! says the cyclist, That must be Lance Armstrong!! No, replies st Peter, that's just god. He thinks he's Lance.

  3. Posted August 10, 2010 at 6:12 pm | Permalink

    I don't have any bike jokes, i am desperately trying to think if i know one!!